Where we've been and where we're going...

howdy friends

sorry for the lack of updates. actually no i'm not sorry because hey this is our blog and we'll update it when we want to (no offense intended...we love the handful of you that actually read this blog). anyways, i'm procrastinating on grading right now so i thought i'd share a couple of updates:

Seattle!

Remember how I told you about Dr. Dobyns at Seattle Children's Hospital? Well so much for that appointment wait list being at 6-8 months...we are officially in for August 26. We've got hotels booked and are working on flights right now. So little gommy pants face is going to get to take his second plane ride for an appointment that's just about him.

We've heard great things about this guy, so I'm hoping that our expectations are met. I'm kind of picturing myself being a 13 year old girl who just met the jonas brothers. I might scream, i might faint, i'm definitely getting pictures and an autograph before getting down to business to pick this guy's brain on what he knows and what he can tell us.

Vacation!

Before that seattle trip, we're headed out with the entire twisty extended family for a week in florida, and let me tell you...after the past 6 months, we can certainly use it. A full week in a VRBO house with a pool and a hot tub overlooking a body of water. Pretty much perfect.

Gommy!

Gommy is making great progress. We're sitting up for extended periods of time, lifting our heads up high, working on rolling over consistently, and definitely playing with toys. The one fantastic thing is that over the past few weeks we've seen him get really into making eye contact...he'll look around for us and the second he sees mommy or daddy he just gets the biggest damn smile on his face. And my heart melts into a puddle on the floor.

Feelings!

We've replaced good days and bad days with good moments and moments that are good but could still be better. I am actually in the middle of one of those could be better moments. When I see my beautiful Gommy, all is well. I recognize that my goodness he's made so much progress over the past three months. When I go to PT or I read stuff on the internet about hemiparesis CP, i cant lie. it makes me sad. it's the difference between thinking of my sweet gommy as a person vs my son...if that makes sense. I want nothing but the best for him, and i think every parent wants their kids life to be nothing but easy and full of joy. What i have to keep telling myself is that 1) easy is in the eye of the beholder--and that everyone has challenges they need to overcome and 2) my son is full of joy and me being a whiny sad little bitch doesnt help him be full of joy.

So much of this journey is/has been about checking myself. Losing myself in service and love of my son. Losing this sense of ego, this sense of...the desire to control and give it all to God. Serve God by serving my son, if that makes sense. And part of serving Gommy means doing things with joy in my heart and love...without any reservation of what the future might hold simply because I have no control whatsoever about the future might hold.

I suppose that's what faith is about. And admittedly i struggle with faith sometimes. I mean i have it, but the intellectual in me wonders why I have it...then i look around at my loved ones...and well life makes sense again and I can say "HEY INTELLECTUAL. SHUT THE EFF UP"

Anyhoo. That's about as philosophic as i'm willing to wax right now. We have adjusted to the 4 appointment a week lifestyle...and are in the process of making even bigger picture family decisions (more on that later). Life is good right now, and only getting better.